Mommy I’m a Bastard (Max Barbakow 2013): USA

Reviewed by Christopher Stull. Viewed at Metropolitan 4, Santa Barbara Film Festival 2013.

This absolutely has to be the best documentary I have ever beheld with mine eyes. I’m just gonna start with that right out of the gate, not only as an ice breaker but as an introduction. Most of my festival views went to fiction, and in some ways I’m regretting that decision, but if i had to see only one documentary, or heck even one film during the event, Mommy, I’m a Bastard would be one of my top three choices. 

Director and hidden star of this film Max Barbakow interviews his family, both adoptive and biological, as to the funny story about his birth and adoption to the Barbakows. I say hidden because Max spends 80% of the movie behind the camera, despite the whole thing being about him, but he does pop up for important and most often hilarious parts of the film.

The point that makes this documentary stand out from the rest is right in the beginning, the opening titles. It gives the impression of a fairly standard doc when Max’s voice over talks about the players involved in his upbringing. And I say players because thats exactly how he describes them; the opening credits are a montage of his family with their names and then who they play in the movie, like his brother Bennett as “Big Brother Benny” and his adoptive mother as “Madre”. Its still a documentary, but it was a really cool way to set it apart, and you do get a different feeling after that. It really breaks the ice and allows you to get emotionally involved.

His mom, dad and brother give the backstory on their family and then transition into how the mom’s friend Bobbi told them about a friend of a friend who was pregnant. Enter Wendy, and soon after, Max. But it was no cake walk for the Barbakows to adopt Max. The mother of Max’s father, Barbara, also tries to adopt him. The film then segues into an interview with Wendy’s father, William Reynolds, who was the Assistant Attorney General for the Civil Rights Division of the Reagan Administration. This is where the film takes an odd turn, and while Max does ask questions about his adoption, he also delves into the civil rights issues when his grandfather was at the head of it. It didn’t seem like it quite fit at the time, and soon after Max tries to get a hold of Barbara. After many canceled interviews he finally interviews her. Her side of the story is wildly different, and when she mentioned her black and american indian heritage being an issue, the previous interview with Max’s grandad makes a lot more sense. Towards the end, Max emails the one person who has been absent the whole time, his birthfather. He asks him many heartfelt questions, and his response is pretty insightful. But to Max, now that he has that answer, isn’t sure he needed it. Which brings us to the end in one of the most hilarious moments of film, probably the best way to end it.

I honestly love this movie. It is paced very well, and Max spaces the parts out with quotes that reflect what the next segment will be about. And there is never gaps in content, it all flows very well. Everyone involved, with the exception of Barbara, feels like someone I would love to meet and get to know, all great people, especially Benny. Barbara though is just off her rocker. I don’t know if Max did it intentionally, but she definitely comes off as the bad guy, which again makes this movie feel less like a documentary and more like a written story. There are very few movies I can truly say that there is nothing wrong with them, and this one just blows me away.

I think the best part, though, came after the movie, when Max came up and did a Q&A session with Rodger Derling. All of the mothers in the audience had something to say about their own adopted children and each time it put a smile on Max’s face. And just about everyone mentioned Barbara and how mean she seemed at some point, which put a smile on my own face. So like twenty thumbs up from me, if every finger and toe I have was a thumb. If you haven’t seen this film, you can actually check out the first part on Max’s Vimeo profile online.